Introduction
It used to be that only celebrities like Madonna reinvented themselves.
But this is the twenty- first century, and the United States
Bureau of Labor Statistics predicts that the average American will
have about nine jobs between the ages of eighteen and thirty-two.
Some have taken this trend a step further. They have changed not
just their jobs but their fields, and have successfully supported
themselves in different careers over a period of several years.
I’m proud to say that I’m a card- carrying member of this group.
I started off my career as a public relations account executive in New
York City. I chose PR because I had studied communications in college
and liked it. I also wanted to make a lot of money and live in the
big city. When the country celebrated the dot- com boom, I delved into
interactive marketing, and after I received an opportunity to work
five minutes away from my new condo in Long Island, I returned
to traditional PR. My experiences working for a global communications
agency and a Fortune 500 software firm taught me not only
the mechanics of publicity, but also how the business world operated
and what young people needed to know to be victorious there.
My second act started mostly by accident. The transition from college
to career was anything but easy, and when things finally started
moving in the right direction, I wanted to share what I’d learned
with other twenty- something employees. A would- be fiction writer
at the time, I was familiar with the process of pitching a book, so
I went out with the idea for They Don’t Teach Corporate in College:
A Twenty- Something’s Guide to the Business World. The book was
acquired by a small publisher, and I was fortunate that it sold well. I was
doing better in my marketing communications career than I ever had
before, but the next thing I knew I was being asked to write for respected
media outlets and travel around the country to speak about workplace
issues facing young employees. The success of They Don’t Teach
Corporate in College, which was originally intended as a side project,
had established my platform as a twenty- something career expert.
Other books followed, and with the birth of my son in 2008,
I finally completed the transition from PR VP to author, speaker,
and consultant. I couldn’t be happier and more satisfied, for my job
now allows me to make a tangible difference in people’s lives every
day. Although I mastered many aspects of the PR profession during
my time in the business world, I couldn’t necessarily say that my
colleagues and clients were personally and professionally better off
for having worked with me in that capacity.
Twenty- and thirty-somethings (or members of Generations X and Y)
who hear about my journey are understandably curious about it.
Because young professionals so often find themselves on career autopilot
as a result of impromptu decisions made in college or shortly
thereafter, career change is one of the hottest topics today. In fact,
according to a recent CareerBuilder survey of more than 5,700 young
workers, more than a third of respondents (35 percent) said they were
interested in making a career change, and in my experience as a
career expert, career change is one of the most frequently requested
speaking topics on college campuses and at association conferences.
On the whole, members of Generations X and Y are looking
to adapt their work to the lifestyle changes they’re making as they
mature. However, they understand that it’s hard to do— especially
now. The damaged economy and the poor job market have resulted
in extreme competition in all types of fields, including those that
weren’t considered desirable before. In New Job, New You, I’ll show
you how you can stand out from millions of others with the same
goals and aspirations.
For example, in many of the chapters I’ll address how to acquire the
right combination of education and experience for your new field,
how to create an inner circle of contacts and mentors who can propel you
forward and how to move the needle a little bit at a time so that you stay
productive and sane while your competition is giving up around you.
You’ll come out on top because you’ll have established yourself
as the total package: a person who is ahead of the game emotionally and
financially as well as professionally.
When I announced on my website that I would be working on
New Job, New You, I received dozens of enthusiastic emails. People
wanted a book that would get to the heart of what makes people
take the plunge into a new field, a book that included the formula
for doing it successfully despite significant societal obstacles. As I
conducted my research, I discovered that career changers have several
common motivations for their decisions, and therefore selected
these motivations as the book’s unifying theme. They are:
• Family: When true work/life balance becomes a necessity
• Independence: When you’ve been bitten by the entrepreneurial
bug
• Learning: When your bookish, curious side takes over
• Money: When an increase in earning potential is on the horizon
• Passion: When you yearn to do what you love with all of your
heart
• Setback: When one door closes, another one opens
• Talent: When you’re too good at something not to give it a shot
Each chapter includes stories of five people who began their careers
in one line of work, and, while in their twenties or thirties, experienced
one or more of these motivations. Moving forward, they used their
existing skills and networking abilities, as well as the education available
to them, to make dramatic and courageous transitions. Throughout,
the book provides mini- assessments, exercises, resource toolkits, and
expert advice for how you can follow similar trajectories.
New Job, New You is about harnessing your own motivations to
execute changes that will enhance your work satisfaction. Let’s start
with a quiz that will help you determine if a career transformation
is something you are seriously ready to consider.
Assessment: Should You Make a Career Change?
Please select “True” or “False” in response to the following
statements.
1. You feel that you are a different person now than when you fi rst
started your career.
True False
2. When you consider your long- term life plan, your current career
path doesn’t match up with where you want to go.
True False
3. If you didn’t need the money, you could walk away from your
field tomorrow and never look back.
True False
4. Your work often feels frustrating and unnatural to you.
True False
5. Your current field doesn’t support the lifestyle you would like to
have for yourself or your family.
True False
6. Looking into the future, you see technology or another
development rendering your job obsolete.
True False
7. You have reached the highest level in your career that you can
reasonably aspire to, and you don’t see additional opportunities for
growth in the foreseeable future.
True False
8. You would like to get another job, but you’re afraid to rock the
boat since your field is small and positions are difficult to come by.
True False
9. You’ve wanted to pursue a certain type of career for a long time,
but circumstances forced you into something else that never quite
fit as well.
True False
10. The work you do on a daily basis doesn’t interest you, and you
constantly find yourself stealing glances at the clock.
True False
11. You’ve spent hours on the Internet researching alternative lines
of work.
True False
12. Your current career doesn’t make good use of your education
and unique set of skills and talents.
True False
13. You’ve had the opportunity to take a different position in your
field, but you don’t see how it would make a difference.
True False
14. The only thing that’s appealing about your job is your
co- workers.
True False
15. You can’t remember what made you choose your industry in the
first place.
True False
16. You know in your heart that you need to move on to a new
field, but you haven’t because you resist change or lack experience.
True False
17. Your field doesn’t afford opportunities to explore new directions
and address fresh challenges.
True False
18. The decision to go into your current field wasn’t your own and
you find it hard to understand why others rave about it.
True False
19. You’ve gone on job interviews in your field where you’ve been
told that you are overqualified, or were asked to accept a salary
much lower than your experience warrants.
True False
20. Although you’ve lost your passion for your work, you are worried
that no one will value you at the bottom rung of a new career.
True False
21. You don’t believe that your current field allows you to contribute
to society or that your work matters, and this bothers you.
True False
22. If you were to give a current college student an informational
interview about your field, it would be difficult to be positive.
True False
23. You’ve been told that you need to acquire additional education
or training to keep up in your field, and you haven’t been
motivated to do this.
True False
24. After a recent vacation, or an event that got you thinking more
about the purpose of life, you returned to work with regret.
True False
25. After years in the traditional workforce, you’ve fi nally realized
that you won’t be truly satisfied unless you can be your own boss.
True False
Add up the total number of “True” and “False” answers and score
your quiz according to this key.
Five or more “True” answers: You probably sensed this already,
but your current career just isn’t doing it for you anymore. Perhaps
you stay in your field because it’s easier, or because you’re afraid.
The forthcoming chapters will introduce you to possibilities you
might not have considered, and alternate paths that have been taken
by people just like you.
Less than five “True” answers: Perhaps you are already in the
field that’s right for you, but there are some aspects of your current job
situation that aren’t ideal. Depending on your motivations, this book
will provide ways to adapt your existing career to your current needs.
Chapter One: Family
The only rock I know that stays steady,
the only institution I know that works is the family.
— Lee Iacocca, business magnate
As a young professional, I was always told by my mentors that I
shouldn’t make a decision about whether to reconfigure my career
to accommodate children until the first one arrived. “You can never
tell how you’re going to feel or what you’ll want to do,” they cautioned.
Yet somehow I knew that I would always want to work without
shipping my kids off to a day- care center eighty hours a week.
So in my mid- twenties, little by little, I started creating a career that
would allow me to be home a few days a week, with the ability to
juggle my work and family lives as I saw fit. By the time my son was
born, I was able to support myself as a writer and speaker. I work
in my home office three days a week, and spend the other two at
playgroups and music classes.
You might associate a schedule like mine with self- employment,
but the workplace is shifting in this regard. As Phyllis Furman
recently reported in the New York Daily News, global consulting
behemoth Ernst & Young provides a flexible work arrangement to 10
percent of its approximately three thousand New York area employees.
Also, when American Express learned in a Center for Work- Life
Policy survey that one- quarter of women worry they could hurt their
careers by asking for flexibility, the company allowed select employees
to customize their schedules to work twenty- one hours a week
without negatively affecting their shot at advancement.
Some fields, however, simply don’t permit individuals to put
their families first, and this is a major reason that workers who are
concerned about children, spouses, and even aging parents decide
to change careers. In this chapter, you’ll meet some inspiring individuals
who took their schedules into their own hands and custom created
careers that are compatible with spending precious time
with loved ones. They are some of the happiest people I came across
while working on this book, and they are as proud of their ability to
achieve balance as they are of their professional endeavors. I’ll close
with some guidance about how to adjust your own career— either
by transitioning to a more family- friendly field or by taking advantage
of new policies where you are— in order to make the people
waiting at home a higher priority in your life.
Leslie
From High- Tech Saleswoman to Novelist
A high- achieving student in the Wharton undergraduate program at
the University of Pennsylvania, Leslie was assured a bright future.
Shortly before graduation, minority recruiters from Xerox Corporation
attended a large job fair in Philadelphia and literally picked
Leslie out of a lineup. “I chose a career in high- tech sales because I
had monster student loans and the pay was the best,” Leslie says.
Over the next several years, Leslie sold “ big- box” equipment for
Xerox, Hewlett- Packard, and Digital Equipment Corporation—companies
with the most professionally recognized sales forces in the
country. “I learned almost military- like discipline, how to have a thick
skin when it comes to rejection, and how to understand business
models, profits, margins, and ROI [return on investment],” she says.
“I also figured out how to sell based on listening to what customers
were really saying they needed, and by the end, I could sell anything.”
Leslie, married and with a newborn, was a supermom. The stress
took its toll, but Leslie continued on her path as a driven sales executive
until her daughter was in an unthinkable accident at her daycare
center. “My six- month- old was left in a room with an ironing
board and a hot iron,” Leslie recalls. “She pulled on the cord and
spilled scalding hot water on herself. I left my job that day and went
to sit vigil at the hospital. She lost three fingers and had seventeen
surgeries.”
These were the days before the Family and Medical Leave Act,
and representatives from Leslie’s company— she dubs them the
“Men in Black”— came to visit her and “nicely” laid her off. “There I
was, unemployed, on the verge of divorce, with no legal settlement
because the day- care provider didn’t have insurance,” she says. “The
day I looked down at my helpless, burned little baby with third degree
wounds all down her left arm and hand, I decided that no
matter what, I wasn’t leaving my child in the hands of anyone else.”
Financially, though, Leslie was in trouble. “I had been making
six figures, and then, nothing. It was like doing a high- wire act and
suddenly realizing that there’s no net,” she says. “I liquidated everything
I had, bled out savings. I started a gift basket company, did
people’s résumés, wrote grants, and hustled a bit as a consultant.”
Then Leslie saw an ad in a magazine for a short- story contest. The
winner received $2,500 in prize money. “My goal was very short term—
write the damn story and win.”
Leslie never submitted that short story because it was too long,
but she kept working on it and before long, she had a book. Without
Leslie’s knowledge, her girlfriends sent the finished manuscript to
publishers, and before long she was offered her first deal. She had
found a fulfilling career that she could have as a stay- at- home mom,
and she jumped on it. Leslie began writing like there was no tomorrow,
eventually penning more than thirty novels and eleven novellas
in a wide range of genres from romance to crime suspense. She
recently won Essence magazine’s Storyteller of the Year Award and
transitioned into the hot new genre of paranormal fiction with her
twelve- book Vampire Huntress Legend series.
Leslie’s experiences caring for her daughter have infused her
writing with compassion and empathy. “My child was badly hurt,
but she is relatively normal save the loss of part of her hand. I saw
people grieving because their children were dead or worse, so horribly
disfigured or mentally damaged that there was no end to the
nightmare,” she says. “I also realized that the deck is stacked against
people who are experiencing hardship, and that you’re not necessarily
a deadbeat because you can’t pay your bills. We are all close to
being a paycheck or two from homelessness, and when I see people
begging in the street now, I’m not so quick to walk by them.”
Leslie, who writes under several pen names (www.leslieesdaile
banks.com), feels blessed to have survived what she terms a frightening,
sobering, and humbling journey that has resulted in greater
accomplishment than she ever imagined. “I have the best job in the
world. I’m a full- time author and I get paid to create entertaining
stories,” she says. “I work at my own pace and am home for my
daughter whenever she needs me. I go to a lot of great conferences,
but when I’m not traveling, I keep the same schedule: see my child
off to school in the morning, walk the dog, answer email, and begin
editing. I end my day when my daughter comes home so that we
can eat dinner together, and then when she starts her homework, I
sit down and let my creativity flow.”
Many people write novels, but few make enough money at it to
be able to stay at home and watch their children grow. Leslie credits
her endurance, discipline, and a strong sense of her own spirituality.
“I can’t tell you how often I have conversations with God,” she
says. To those who are looking to change careers, she advises, “Start
now before you are forced to. Do a little bit every night to chip away
at the task. And begin your new career as a sideline to your regular
job. That way, you’ll have a trial period to gain strength and fi nancial
stability before you jump ship.”
J.B.
From Automotive Marketer to Toy Producer
As a Detroit native, it’s no surprise that thirty- nine- year- old J.B. got
his start in the car business. Shortly after graduating from John
Carroll University with a degree in marketing, he went to work for
the Caribiner Group, where he coordinated corporate meetings for
large automotive clients. “These were multimillion- dollar productions
in which automotive executives would introduce new car models
to their sales forces and dealers,” explains J.B. “It was a great
experience on many fronts. I got to be a part of the inner workings
of some of the most famous companies, and I learned the essentials
of communication by working with some of the best speechwriters,
coaches, and presentation creators out there.”
J.B. wanted to expand his marketing horizons beyond meeting
planning, however, so he took a job at DMB&B, a more traditional
fi rm that represented Cadillac and Pontiac. Responsible for catalogs
and dealership collateral materials, as a young twenty- something J.B.
found himself managing multifaceted projects. “I worked with the client
engineers on catalog content, as well as our art directors, copywriters,
graphic designers, and print production staff,” he says. “It was a
challenge fi guring out how to get the most out of all of these people.”
J.B. spent the next few years continuing to market cars. His job at
DMB&B was followed by a direct marketing position at advertising
powerhouse McCann- Erickson, and then by a role as a marketing
manager at a division of General Motors. Of the latter job, he says:
“I was exposed to so much because the company was exploring different
areas of growth, and backed by GM we had the resources to
get things done. It was fantastic . . . that is, until it got too big and too
bureaucratic.”
At the age of twenty- eight, J.B. married his college sweetheart,
Michele, with whom he’d had a long- distance relationship. They
began building their family soon afterward, welcoming daughter
Anna and son Konrad. “There’s something about having children
that makes you picture your life down the road,” says J.B. “I knew
I didn’t want to be marketing cars when my kids were in college. I
wanted to be on my own, and to be able to participate in my kids’
lives while they were growing up.”
J.B. decided that the best path to entrepreneurship would be a
master’s degree of business administration from Babson College,
near Boston. “I needed a new network and the right MBA program
could help me develop that,” he says. J.B. was making a career
change in part because of his family, and his family was what saw
him through the obstacles. “Without their emotional support and
day- to- day help, I never would have made it through the long road
of GMAT testing, applications, choosing where to go, selling the
house and most everything in it, moving, and downgrading our
lifestyle.”
Indeed, the pressure was on. J.B. and Michele had two more children,
and J.B. felt compelled to make sure the family was comfortable
fi nancially as soon as he finished school. The couple was also devastated
by the sudden deaths of two of their siblings, including the sister
to whom J.B. was closest. “These losses further cemented my decision
to pursue the dream of having my own business. After all, you never
know what’s going to happen. We could all be gone tomorrow.”
In the Babson MBA program, J.B. met Antonio Turco- Rivas, a
classmate who shared J.B.’s desire to involve his family in doing
what he loved. Both being parents, J.B. and Antonio realized that
home is one of the key environments where children play and learn,
and they saw a need to improve play furniture. J.B. and Antonio
sponsored research with the Rhode Island School of Design, and
the result was their new company’s flagship product, the P‘kolino
Play Table. Before they knew it, the two had finished their degrees,
moved to South Florida to be closer to their extended families,
and were getting their children’s input on new designs for chairs,
benches, desks, and storage containers.
Today, J.B. is in charge of the product development and marketing
functions for P‘kolino (www.pkolino.com). “I’ve always been a
closet engineer, so I love being hands- on, working with the prototypes,”
he says. “And things are going well. We’ve recently started
working with large clients like Babies ‘R’ Us, and moving many of
our products overseas. But Antonio and I, we’re never satisfied. We
want P‘kolino to be a household name.”
What J.B. is satisfied with, though, is his lifestyle. “I’m in total control
of my career, and that means no more useless face time— feeling
like you have to be in the office even if your work is done,” he says.
“I’m in a situation where I can keep on top of things while making
time to take my kids to school and socialize with the other parents. I
never have to apologize to anyone for making my family a priority.”
J.B. encourages others to acknowledge that what is important to
your family should have an impact on the career you choose. “You
can create any type of life you want, but it will often require stepping
out of your comfort zone,” he says. “Just remember that the fear of
regret is stronger than the fear of failure.”
Erica
From Television Ad Manager to “ Mom- preneur”
Erica always had a special hobby that wasn’t shared by other kids her
age. Transfixed by commercials instead of television shows, Erica
spoke in taglines as a child. She spent her teen years shadowing her
uncle, who was an art director at an advertising agency in Houston
and in college she worked at radio and television stations. “I
got an internship building content and advertising opportunities at
an America Online subsite, the Family Travel Network,” says Erica,
now thirty- three. “But when I began looking for a full- time job in
advertising or marketing I found few options. Then, one day I heard
that a local radio station was recruiting telemarketers to staff a new
phone center for listener research. I impressed the team and was
offered an account executive job for one of their newest radio stations,
WRBT- FM in Harrisburg, Pennsylvania.”
Erica had never considered working in sales, but she fi gured
she’d take the job to learn as much as she could and position herself
for a promotion into the marketing department. Ironically, though,
Erica quickly discovered she had genuine sales skill— and that she
hated the radio business. She accepted a sales job in television at the
CBS affiliate in Harrisburg and immediately felt at home. “I studied
my clients, their competitors, and their messaging,” she explains.
“I knew that if I could create campaigns that were solution- based
rather than just negotiate spot schedules, I would earn business.”
In the two years Erica worked for CBS, she got married and gave
birth to her first daughter. The new family relocated to Washington,
D.C., where Erica continued her television sales career as an
account executive with WUSA- TV, Gannett’s CBS station, and then
WRC- TV, the NBC affiliate. While at NBC, Erica grew her account
list and became one of the top billers at the station. But despite her
success, she felt herself slipping back into the part of the job she disliked—
negotiating rates and spot schedules and making deals over
the phone. She yearned to return to her solution- driven approach
to sales, where she was part of the planning process and not just
someone who appeared at the end to configure a placement.
Erica stepped up her efforts to take advantage of new business
opportunities that included station sponsorships and customized
programs for TV, events, and the Internet, and her results landed
her a promotion. Then, about a year later, Erica got a call from her
sister station in Philadelphia. “They were creating a new marketing
management position, and I drove up for the interview,” Erica says.
“On my way back to D.C., the vice president called and offered me
the position. I was so excited I almost drove off the highway. I was
twenty- seven years old and I had my dream job— a marketing manager
at an NBC affiliate in the fourth- largest market in the country.”
Erica called her husband to tell him the news, but unfortunately,
he didn’t share her enthusiasm. “He didn’t want to move and told
me to decline the position,” she says. “Eventually he relented, but
this was the first time I was faced with the reality that what was best
for my career wasn’t necessarily what was best for my family.” Up in
Philadelphia, Erica focused on becoming an all- around marketing
pro, working with the national and regional sales teams as well as
the news, interactive, and community departments to sell sponsorships
and create creative, branded campaigns around them.
When Erica gave birth to her second daughter and returned to
work after her maternity leave, she was tasked with managing a business
development department in addition to her existing responsibilities.
“I was under intense pressure to get it right and show results
quickly,” Erica remembers. “In the first year, my team generated
three million dollars in new business, but we needed to double that.
It seemed no matter how much I gave, they needed more.”
One random June afternoon, Erica left work early to have dinner
with her kids, something she only did a few times a year. “I will
never forget that day,” she says. “I walked into the backyard, expecting
to hear my daughters screaming ‘Mommy’s home!’ Instead I
found my husband playing in the pool with the girls. They were
laughing and having the greatest time. As I stood there watching
them in my suit, I realized I was going to work every day to afford a
life I wasn’t even a part of. My girls were eight and almost two, and
I hardly knew them. I had to rethink my life.”
Together with a friend, Erica brainstormed the idea for a website
that would help moms fi nd local services they needed, complete with
ratings and reviews from other moms. When they talked to their
prospective audience and got a resounding response, Erica closed
her eyes, held her breath, and quit her job. Originally financed by
Erica’s friend and now business partner, MomSpace (www.mom
space.com) is thriving— but not without some bumps along the way.
“I thought that since I knew how to make money, the rest would fall
into place, but suddenly I was struggling to understand the ins and
outs of the information technology industry,” Erica says. “I thought
I could just hire certain skill sets, but boy was I wrong. You can’t
hire anyone unless you know enough to realize what you need.”
She has also had to overcome the skepticism of her former clients
and colleagues. “When I’d talk about tightening the purse strings
in order to make a go of the business, they thought I’d lost it and
would squeal, ‘What, no Louis Vuitton?’ They all wondered how
long it would take me to come back. Well, they’re still waiting.”
Erica now creates her schedule around her children. In the
morning, she gets them ready for the day, and then depending on
circumstances, she’ll work from home or go into the office. Her
work responsibilities vary. “I might work with the content team to
make sure we have relevant articles on the site, talk with office
administration to see that invoicing has been done properly, take
calls from potential investors, or work on strategy with my partner,”
she says. Able to eat with her family whenever she likes, Erica feels
both stressed out and exhilarated by her new career. “It’s a totally
different ball game when you own the issues in every department,
but I couldn’t be more excited about what we’re building.”
Erica urges would- be family men and women to be realistic.
“There may be times in your new situation when you actually see
your family less. With any major life change there’s a period of
adjustment, so don’t second- guess your decision because it’s harder
than you thought,” she says. Reflecting on her own transition, Erica
adds, “I learned the importance of a strong sense of self. It’s so easy
to get lost in this world, judging your worth by your job title or paycheck.
I now have a clear picture of the mother, wife, and woman I
want to be. I hold on to that every day.”
Lisa Marie
From Bank Teller to Federal Law Enforcement Officer to
Leadership Company President
Thirty- nine-year-old Lisa Marie hails from a working-class neighborhood
in Allentown, Pennsylvania. Going to college wasn’t common
in her family, but Lisa Marie always wanted a job that wasn’t typically
open to women. “I grew up watching police shows and Murder,
She Wrote with my grandparents, and one of my mom’s friends suggested
I check out criminal justice as a career,” Lisa Marie says. “It
appealed to the protector in me, so I pursued a bachelor of science
at the University of Scranton.”
As she got closer to graduation, however, summers working at
Arby’s diminished Lisa Marie’s career ambition. While she was still
in school, she got a job working the shredder at the People First
Credit Union in Allentown. “After I finished my degree, I went to
work there as a teller,” she says. “It wasn’t really a career choice, it
was more that I wanted to eat. But I started worrying that I’d be
there forever and never use my degree. Banking might have been
safe, but if I didn’t make a change now, when would I?”
Lisa Marie decided that she wanted to see the world, so she
hit the library and researched government jobs that involved law
enforcement and travel. After applying and taking an aptitude test,
Lisa Marie qualified to work at the U.S. Customs and Border Protection
agency. Her first position was with the marine department
and her main responsibility was to “clear the ships” and ensure all
of the paperwork was in order for large vessels entering the Port of
Newark/New York from international waters. Next, Lisa Marie went
to work for the Contraband Enforcement Team, where she spent
many a hot and sweaty day looking for narcotics in containers of
everything from African wooden paddles to frozen sharks.
A third role with Outbound Enforcement involved inspecting
cargo leaving the United States to check for illegally smuggled
funds. “Despite my experience, I was basically forced into a lesser
position because I was a woman,” Lisa Marie relates. “But you know
what, I learned a lot. In scheduling overtime, I was a neutral party
dealing with people’s money. There was so much infighting about
who was going to get off when, and it was a struggle to pay attention
and listen to people. I realized that things don’t always work out the
way we want and we still have to make the best of them.”
Meanwhile, Lisa Marie had gotten involved in the Women in
Government leadership and networking group and had been introduced
to the field of training and development. She discovered she
really liked it, and once she received a promotion back onto the
Outbound Enforcement team, she entered a Seton Hall University
master’s program in training and development targeted to federal
law enforcement officers. “It was a different type of educational
environment,” Lisa Marie recalls. “K9 units would bring their dogs
to class.” In addition to the dogs, there was another interesting participant
in one of Lisa Marie’s classes— her future husband. “We
dated for a long time without talking about marriage. After all, we
were both in federal law enforcement and were never in the same
state. It just wouldn’t work.”
Lisa Marie was briefly transferred to airport security before
pleading her case for a position at the Training Center within the
Department of Homeland Security. “There I developed the curriculum
and taught future DHS leaders,” she says. “It was a dream job,
and there was talk that they’d make me the assistant commissioner.
But by then, my boyfriend and I had decided to get married, and we
thought a lot about what marriage actually meant. We realized that
we couldn’t both be in federal law enforcement and reside in the
same place long- term. The career simply doesn’t allow it.”
Lisa Marie decided to leave federal law enforcement to start her
own leadership training business, and instantly went from six figures
to no figures. “People thought I was crazy, but I looked at it as
a way to be committed to my relationship and actually help more
people than I could in government,” she says. “But it was a hard
adjustment. In addition to the drastic income drop, I had no idea
where to get clients, and I’d gone from being someone important to
being anonymous. There was so much I didn’t know about having
my own company.”
As a result of time and networking, Lisa Marie’s leadership development
business, Upside Thinking, Inc. (www.upsidethinking.com),
has steadily gained ground. The company’s mission is to teach
professionals to develop a clear leadership vision, increase their
sphere of influence, and achieve long- term growth and steady profits.
“I spend my days delivering seminars, mostly on how to turn
contacts into contracts,” she says. “I meditate every morning, read
something every day that helps my professional development, and
evaluate every day at its end to assess what I should do differently.”
Lisa Marie recommends that individuals with families consider
their priorities to be 1) self, 2) family, and 3) work. “You have to
identify exactly what your family’s needs are, and how your career
can address them,” she advises. “For example, if it’s time you need,
sometimes you can get that without changing fields. There are jobs
in most industries that don’t require you to be on call 24/7. Be prepared,
though, that the choices you have to make may be difficult.
No one can have it all.”
Today, Lisa Marie and her husband have a comfortable life in
Coral Gables, Florida. Lisa Marie serves on several committees and
boards including her local chamber of commerce and a local nonprofit
that provides emergency relief services to the community. She
recently received a Woman of Excellence Award from the National
Association of Female Executives and a Woman of the Year Award
from the For You Network. On her success, Lisa Marie has this to
say: “I just keep on learning, and I’m really lucky to have an amazing
team of mentors.”
John
From International Researcher to Education Salesperson to
Instructional Designer
Always intrigued by international relations, John followed up his
education at the University of Notre Dame with a Ph.D. program in
political science at Ohio State. After so many years of school, he was
eager to go right to work for the Midwest Universities Consortium
for International Activities (MUCIA). “At MUCIA, my main responsibilities
were project management and grant proposal writing and
research for large international projects funded by the World Bank,
the Asian Development Bank, and the Inter- American Development
Bank,” John explains. “Even while I was getting my Ph.D.,
I knew that I did not want to work at a university as a professor.
Instead I wanted a business job with an international focus.”
John spent a number of years focusing on international education and
then technology education. His assignments required a great deal
of travel, which John enjoyed enormously. He racked up experience
in international business, negotiation, and entrepreneurship.
Meanwhile, John got married and he and his wife had three boys,
each born two years apart. “After a while, international travel for
ten days to two weeks at a time was no longer attractive,” he says.
“I did not like spending so much time away from my children and
missing the important milestones in their lives.” John switched to
a national sales job in education technology and was soon on a fast
track to promotion in a Denver- based company. But his expanding
role forced him to spend every other week across the country, and
when he missed his oldest son’s birthday, John opted for another
sales job closer to home in Columbus, Ohio.
For the next few years, John drifted from job to job, always in
pursuit of the right balance of family and work— a difficult proposition
in sales. Because his salary continued to increase, it was always
too easy to stay in sales even as the career did not meet his family’s
needs or his professional aspirations. John realized he had a special
gift for e- learning, but as he searched for jobs in instructional design
that carried a compensation similar to that of his current sales job,
it became clear that he would need to take a pay cut. “In order to
make the transition, I prepared to take on extra work consulting and
teaching online to supplement my income,” he tells us.
In applying for the position of e- learning specialist with Micro
Electronics, Inc. in Columbus, John was able to leverage his intimate
knowledge and understanding of sales. Now designing interactive
training courses and simulations for sales forces and their management,
John is an 8 a.m.–5 p.m. employee who never travels or works
weekends. “My career fits perfectly with my family obligations and I
love being home every night with my wife and kids. I have not missed
one soccer game, swim meet, or choral concert since I started this job,”
he says. And it’s not just his family that’s benefiting. John has realized
how professionally satisfied and fulfilled he is working in instructional
design. In just over a year, he has changed the way his company provides
training and was put in charge of a major initiative that has him
reporting directly to the vice president of human resources.
John’s journey taught him that it’s possible to shape a career that
maintains your income but also aligns well with one’s life goals. “It took
a big leap of faith to suffer a twenty- five percent pay cut and become an
entry- level instructional designer even though I had ten years of work
experience. There was a lot of fear,” John admits. “Luckily, I was able
to fi nd a position that required a background in sales. Not only am I
creating content for our sales forces, but I have also given a number of
internal presentations to our CEO and the executive staff. Years of sales
presentations to C- level prospects certainly helped in this regard.”
John feels that he brings a level of fun and creativity to his work
that was missing before. And more important, he believes that he is
a success on the job and at home. “My advice to other people who
are looking to change careers to focus more on their family is to
simply take the risk. If you find yourself away from your family on
a regular basis and it hurts your heart, then you must find a career
that permits you to be more involved,” he says. “Review your inventory
of skills from your past jobs and take a close look at what you
want to do. Often, there are new careers or ways to make a career
change in which you can use your past experience to become a valuable
resource in your new position.”
Self-Reflection: Is Family Your Motivation?
• Are you so stressed out by your job that you have minimal
energy to devote to your family?
• Does it pain you that your children spend long hours in day
care?
• Do you and your spouse currently live in separate locations
because of your jobs?
• Do you have an elderly relative who relies on you for care and
support you feel you don’t have time to give?
• Would you like to marry your significant other, but hesitate because
you feel that your job already demands everything you have?
• Do you want to be the kind of parent who is hands- on, but can’t
be because of your work responsibilities?
• Do you feel like you are missing your children grow up?
• Does your spouse complain that your work is ruining your
marriage?
• Does your high salary no longer provide satisfaction because you
aren’t around to share in its rewards?
• Is there a time every day when you find yourself feeling torn and
guilty?
If you answered “Yes” to two or more of these questions,
you may be inspired to make a career transition in order to better
address the needs of your family. Read on for some guidance on
how to make it happen.
Putting the Change to Work
Consider the family’s financial makeup: Before you change your
job situation, you need to determine if it’s possible financially. In
her article “7 Financial Steps Every Working Mom Needs to Know,”
Galia Gichon of Down- to- Earth Finance suggests taking a financial
snapshot to get a better handle on your money responsibilities. It
can be as simple as asking yourself the following questions:
• How much do you owe? Include mortgage, credit cards, student
loans, personal loans, and home equity loans.
• How much do you own? Include all investments, bank accounts,
retirement plans, and home equity.
• How much do you spend? This should be one number for
your monthly spending. Be sure to include all those extra little
expenses that wreak havoc on budgets.
• How much do you earn? What is your total income after taxes
for the year, the month, and year- to- date?
Talk over these answers with your significant other or spouse (if
you have one) to determine if your family could weather a decrease
in income as you switch to a more flexible work schedule or pursue
an alternative career path. Keep in mind that in addition to covering
monthly expenses, you must still add to your savings. You should
be contributing at least 3 percent of your income to your retirement
plan, and if you don’t have a 401(k) plan at work, establish an IRA.
Maximizing up to the $500 annual contribution limit by contributing
$416 a month is a good idea as Social Security becomes shakier
and shakier. If you’re a parent, you should also make sure you are
funding college education plans and life insurance coverage. Plans
like the 529 allow your money to grow tax- deferred and ensure that
it is free of taxes when it is withdrawn to attend an accredited university.
As for life insurance, you should have adequate coverage
until your youngest child is eighteen years old. Visit websites such
as www.kiplinger.com to calculate your best options.
Cultivate a dual-centric point of view: Your mind- set is very
important in how satisfied you are with your life over the long term.
Dual- centric is a concept coined by Ellen Galinsky at the Families
and Work Institute, and essentially it means that you place the same
priority on your life on and off the job. Galinsky’s study found that
dual- centric individuals feel more successful at work despite putting
in an average of fi ve hours less per week. They are objectively
less stressed out, and have an easier time managing the conflicting
responsibilities associated with family and work.
Strategies that work for
dual-centric people include being clear about what’s
important to them, setting strict boundaries between the time they
are working and not working, focusing on the immediate situation
and being emotionally present when one is physically present, and
taking time to rest, recover, and pursue interests outside of work.
Network with other caregivers: For working caregivers, developing
friendships is often a low priority. This is understandable, for
after all, any free time is usually spent struggling to keep up with
errands and chores. Nevertheless, talking to other people in your
position can give you valuable insights, especially when it comes to
managing your career. How can you do this with minimal time and
effort? Well, first of all, look for any opportunity to strike up conversations.
Introduce yourself to the person standing behind you at the
supermarket, or the father waiting to pick up his child at day care.
Find outlets for communicating easily with other caregivers, including
local area email lists and online message boards— and use them.
If you can swing it, make a pact to spend an hour a week attending
an event that interests you, and chat with the other attendees about
their families. Find out what they do for a living, and probe them for
strategies they use to balance responsibilities at work and home.
Take advantage of flextime and telework policies: In order to
encourage better work/life balance, and as a response to technology
that allows workers 24/7 accessibility, many organizations are
implementing flextime and teleworking policies. Flextime arrangements
might include part- time or compressed schedules (for example,
the employee works forty hours from Monday to Thursday and
takes Friday off ) and job sharing, in which a full- time position is
split between two people. Teleworking or telecommuting means
that for at least part of the business week, an employee works from
a remote location— often the home. Talk with HR and/or read your
orientation materials to understand how your organization’s flextime
procedure works. Note that even if the company doesn’t have
an official policy in place, if there are other people in your department
who are already working flexible schedules, it shouldn’t be
unreasonable for you to hop on the bandwagon— provided you can
honestly say you have the self- discipline to work productively without
supervision.
In making an argument for flextime, always put the company
first. Your boss does not want to hear that working from home will
allow you to meet your daughter’s school bus. Instead, tell him that
you plan to get more work done in less time due to the minimization
of distractions and not having to commute. Ask for a trial of
the new arrangement, and prove the cost savings by working much
more efficiently at home than you do during your in- office days.
Next, put together a cohesive written proposal that details how the
arrangement will work, how you will complete your assignments,
how you will handle unforeseen circumstances or emergencies, and
any changes in compensation and/or benefits that will result.
Once you get started, make sure that you are always accessible
via email and cellphone during the business day, and report project
status often so it’s easy for your boss to keep tabs on you. Telework
expert Gil Gordon offers these additional tips in his Work & Family
Connection’s e- course, Making Telecommuting Successful:
• Request weekly feedback from your supervisor on how the
telecommuting arrangement is working.
• Ask for a volunteer office buddy to take responsibility for
emailing you office news weekly, in return for a monthly
invitation to lunch.
• Show up if necessary. People won’t always be able to work
around your schedule, so you may have to come in on some days
you ordinarily work from home.
• If there’s a meeting planned at which your work will be discussed,
be sure you’re invited. Volunteer to make presentations or write
reports that make your deliverables more visible.
• Pay attention to perceptions. Some telecommuters notice
relationships cooling with no warning, perhaps the result of a
perceived slight or jealousy on the part of someone who wants
to telecommute.
Look at work- from- home possibilities: Work- from- home scams
abound on the Internet, so you must proceed carefully here. In her
“Take Control of Your Life” series for Good Morning America, home
work expert Tory Johnson profiles two reputable career paths that
you can manage from your home. The first is home- based customer
service agent. Because many large companies are cutting back on
staff positions to save on salary and benefits and one of the first
departments they outsource is customer service, Johnson expects
that at least twenty thousand new agents will be recruited this year.
Some of the better- known organizations include LiveOps (www.liveops.com),
which hires home- based salespeople and licensed insurance
agents for both health and life, and Arise (www.arise.com),
which recruits agents with specialized language skills.
The second option is direct seller, a career that has recently expanded
beyond the typical “Avon Lady.” According to the Direct Selling Association,
more than 14 million Americans make a living as direct sellers,
meaning they sell products or services person- to- person, outside a
traditional retail location. Sellers usually have their own pages on the
company’s website where they can take and process orders, and allow
customers to reorder online. Each time you make a sale, you earn a
commission, and if you recruit people to become sellers, you’ll make
a small commission on their sales, too. How do you decide what to
sell? Johnson recommends that you pick a product line that you are
passionate about. If you can’t see yourself using the products or giving
the products as gifts, stay away.
The Direct Selling Association (www.dsa.org) offers a list of two
hundred companies in a wide variety of categories, although you should check out
all prospective organizations with the Better Business Bureau to ensure they’re
on the up-and-up. Keep in mind that while the direct seller role is ideal for parents
who care for children, it is mostly suitable for supplemental income.
The median earnings in direct sales is $2,500 annually, which means
50 percent of the people in the field make more and half make less.
I’m also a fan of the twenty- first-century career of the virtual assistant
(VA). I became acquainted with this job last year when I saw a
segment about Karen Reddick on the Today show. Karen is a VA who
helps run small businesses like Holland Travel in St. Louis from her
home office in Colorado. Karen, the owner of V- and- E Services, is a
former executive assistant and originally conceived the idea for her
business after the terrorist attacks of September 11, 2001. Starting the
new career was her way to put family first and be home for her teenage
daughter. Karen helps clients using the latest technology to deliver
creative administrative support and technical business services to
busy professionals. She charges forty- five dollars an hour, and projects
and personal schedules are often handled by email and instant messaging.
I love the VA position because everyone involved wins. It provides
business owners who might not have the cash to hire a full-time,
salaried employee the ability to focus on running their operations
without spending precious time and resources on administrative
concerns. Plus, it allows people like Karen to do their jobs effectively,
make good money, and achieve the ultimate work/life balance.
Consider traditional careers with an established second tier:
According to Mary Ann Mason and Eve Mason Ekman, in their
book, Mothers on the Fast Track, roughly half of highly educated
women who begin a fast- track job will stay the course, but a substantial
number, mostly mothers, will drop out or drop down to a less
demanding track known as the second tier. The second tier typically
has lower status, pays less, has fewer benefits and perks, and has little
to no chance of major advancement. As the twenty- first century
progresses, the second tier is emerging in professions such as law,
medicine, and corporate management. In medicine, for example,
dermatology, anesthesiology, radiology, and emergency room medicine
tend to offer more reasonable hours. Second- tier options open
to caregivers with law degrees include nonequity partner in a large
law firm, and counselor positions in corporations, government, and
nonprofit organizations. There’s a second tier in academia, too— in
fact, the fastest- growing segment of employees in academia is part time
and adjunct faculty. These individuals are not on a tenure track
and, while they don’t have the status and security of full professors,
they enjoy much greater flexibility and the ability to take assignments
selectively.
In the years to come, Mason and Ekman hope
that educated caregivers who have settled in the second tier will
have an easier time reentering the top tier if they choose.
Research caregiver- friendly options: Caroline Wilbert, career and
money editor for one of my content partners, DivineCaroline, suggests
several jobs that are well suited for moms and others with caregiving
duties. Among them are writing, teaching, by- appointment
jobs, and health- care jobs. From my own research on dream jobs,
I’ve assembled information on some of the most popular career
paths in each of these categories:
• Writing (sample job: freelancer): Freelance writers develop content
and articles for a variety of corporate and media outlets. They
are skilled at writing, of course, but they also have excellent time
management and organizational skills as well as stellar business
sense. Michelle Goodman, author of My So- Called Freelance Life,
recommends picking the brains of seasoned freelancers to get
their best tips for working solo. Look at the websites, read their
books and blogs, and ask questions not just about their craft, but
also about how they approach specific entrepreneurial problems.
Do what you can to develop ongoing relationships with these
folks, because many writers get a majority of their referrals from
other freelancers who are too busy to take on a project. Finally,
says Goodman, make sure your computer and other equipment
are up to par, and that you have a good accountant to help you out
with bookkeeping and tax issues.
• Teaching (sample job: elementary school teacher): Elementary school
teachers typically instruct one class of around twenty children in
several subjects, including reading, writing, math, science, and
social studies. Most teachers work a ten- month school year with a
two- month vacation during the summer, but in some areas with a
year- round schedule, the teachers work eight weeks in a row with
a one- week vacation and a five- week midwinter break. According
to the Bureau of Labor Statistics’ Occupational Outlook Handbook,
all states require teachers to have a bachelor’s degree and to have
completed an approved teacher- training program. If you’re interested
in transitioning to a teaching career, check out the American
Federation of Teachers (www.aft.org) and the National Education
Association (www.nea.org) websites. You may fi nd that your state
offers accelerated licensure due to a shortage of qualified teachers.
• By-appointment jobs (Sample job: life coach): By- appointment jobs
are made up of individual engagements that caregivers can set
to their liking. One such up- and- coming job is a life coach. Life
coaches provide an environment to help people produce fulfilling
results in their personal and professional lives, and are trained to
listen, observe, and customize their approach to individual client
needs. The process typically begins with a short interview so that
the coach can assess the person’s current challenges, priorities, and
desired results. Subsequent sessions may last about sixty minutes,
and between scheduled meeting times, the coach may ask the
client to complete specific exercises or read materials that support
behavior change and goal achievement. In order to become a life
coach, you must complete a program accredited by the International
Coach Federation (www.coachfederation.org). In addition to teaching
necessary competencies such as establishing trust and managing
progress, the program will instruct you on building your practice
and persuading others of the value of your services.
• Health-care (sample job: physical therapist): The health- care sector
continues to have one of the strongest growth rates in the nation,
and in fact the need for qualified professionals has now surpassed
the number of available workers. The demand for physical
therapists, who plan and participate in rehabilitative programs
to improve mobility, relieve pain, increase strength, and decrease
or prevent deformity of patients suffering from disease or injury,
is especially high right now. The Bureau of Labor Statistics’
Occupational Outlook Handbook claims that nearly six out of ten
physical therapists work in hospitals or in solely or jointly managed
PT offices, and the others are employed with home health- care
services, nursing care facilities, outpatient care centers, and adult
day- care programs. Approximately 25 percent of American physical
therapists currently work part- time. Gaining entry to the profession
requires an accredited physical therapist educational program that
takes a few years to complete and includes coursework in biology,
chemistry, neuroanatomy, and human growth and development.
Besides getting classroom and laboratory instruction, students
receive supervised clinical experience so that they are prepared to
practice immediately upon graduation.
Exercise: Assessing Your Family’s Needs
• Write down the three most critical things your family needs from
you right now.
• Do you feel that your current job allows you to provide those
things as effectively as you would like? Why or why not?
• Talk to your family about your work. Write down key learnings
from these conversations.
• In an ideal work scenario, what would be your schedule?
• Brainstorm three ways to adapt your current career to your ideal
schedule. If it’s not possible, write down three new careers to research
that you think would help you achieve better work/life balance.
• Inviting your spouse or significant other to contribute, make a list
of the pros and cons of changing to a more family- friendly work
situation.